September 19, 2007

Completely stressed out

We had this Environmental Project to submit. Our professor informed us well in advance a week before the date for submission. Now that wasn't good news. I was in a group of three. The other two in my group were girls from my college. That wasn't a much big issue. But as you know, you always tend to follow what they say. So we agreed to meet in college for completion of the project...that was a day before the submission. But plans got changed when they requested me to come to their house instead to college. That was fine to me and fixed a time with them.

While leaving home, my mother just casually asked me as to where I was going. I informed her on the same just to hear a tantrum of hundreds of questions that I got as a 'soft' reply. Coming from a Christian family that's a bit conserved on its ideas regarding this world, it wasn't unusual and I expected such kind of thoughts because I was going to a girls house. But it was wise to not keep it a secret and land up into much more trouble. Reaching their house was a big adventure. They lived in Dadar(W) and I landed up in Dadar(E) searching for their house. Then after asking directions to almost everyone I crashed into, I finally managed to reach there an half an hour later. Worked on the project and returned home only by 6pm.
Started with a short prayer asking for God's help and started writing the project...Went on till dinner and realized that I had a lot still remaining.

Sat up in the night, with a heavy head, till about 1am. Sill had a lot more to write. Next morning I had to go for class early in the morning. So slept with a very confused mind as to go or not for the class. If I hadn't completed the project by the next day which was the deadline for its submission, I would lose a whole precious 20 marks. So I slept deciding not to go for the class. Next morning got up early and started writing the project, not knowing the vastness in it, I prayed a short prayer skipping my morning quite time. Scrambling here and there for printouts and pictures, I managed to finish the project only by 11am. Rushed to the college knowing that I was already late and was going to be jacked for that. On my way I remembered that I had forgotten some important papers that I had to carry along. My heart almost skipped some beats. Luckily that day, I could submit the project and get my other work done too, thanks to my friends who helped me out.

Happily I returned home, leaving behind a very big burden. Remembered those short prayers that I prayed along all throughout and thanked God for his help. I really credited God for helping me because I felt it would have been virtually impossible for me to complete the project in time. After around 9 hours of writing, it felt so light and peaceful without having that burden to carry around.

That night I got the biggest shock of my life. While laying down to sleep I suddenly remembered that I had forgotten in all that mess and hurry, to write my name on the project!!! My heart apparently stopped. Couldn't think about anyway out. Submission's done. Those 9 hours of writing, the stress in it, no sleep, missed class....would all that go in vain?? I just couldn't sleep that night. Did God do this purposely?? Would he forsake me in the end? Would he not pay heed to all those prayers I prayed to him? I was shaken thinking these things. Once again I prayed to God and asked him for his help. But that night I couldn't sleep peacefully.

The next day, I just couldn't concentrate in my class. After class immediately went to college and tried to do something. Our professor was the kind of guy who would fire you black and blue till you are really ashamed of yourself. However, I couldn't meet him and asked a peon for help. He found the problem a no big issue and readily understood my problem and helped me out. Thanks to his efforts, I could heave a sigh of relief that day.

Through all this I realized that God will never forsake his children. Some way or the other, he is always there to help them out. But all that we need to do is to ask of him his help. So many a times we leave the house even without a simple prayer of 'God help me'. We tend to forget that every step that we take is by his grace and strength, not by our merits but by his favor. Lets not forget to always ask God for his help though the task be small or great.

1 comment:

  1. God consciousness tells us a bunch about our spiritual growth.

    Texas Ron Linebarger

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